In short, I have closed my eyes. I am the type of person who doesn't keep track of my spending. As long as I have a general sense that I have X amount in my bank account, I don't pay much attention. Until that X amount starts getting too thin, as it has lately.

For the first time, this tax season, I input my personal spending from 2009 to see where my money has gone. I saw how much I took in from my three renters and my incorporated business, the amount spend on gasoline and utilities, my annual budget on clothing ($450), groceries ($2K), home improvements ($450), kids entertainment/activities ($1.5K), restaurants/entertainment ($2K). The kids and I spent $3K on travel, including a wonderful trip to Oregon. I had a huge bill to repair and redecorate my basement apartment after a nasty sewage backup issue last year, and my property taxes have become incredibly high. In all, I could see at a glance that I spent $6K more than I earned last year. That has been the general case for a few years and has led me to have credit card debt for the first time, and sell some past investments to keep balanced.

So, having looked directly at my spending and earning, my eyes are now open. I have been gradually working toward getting my house ready for market, so I can reduce the amount I spend on utilities and taxes. I attended a talk by Ruth Hayden about spending and saving psychology. One thing I learned is that there are two types of people who get into trouble: 1) those who work for income without enjoying what they value, such as time with family or travel or hobbies; 2) those who enjoy what they value without working enough for income.

In my 20s and 30s I was the former, which is why I have the investments to slowly sell off now. Since becoming a mom, I have become the latter. And it took that seminar to finally hear that valuing my time with my kids over money is NOT as lofty as I was letting myself believe.

Whether you are in group 1 or 2, you'll find a lot on this website to help you straighten your priorities. We just talked here in April about stress relief, which usually happens when we work without play. Now in May we are focusing on Money Matters (search keyword: money matters), which is when we play our favorite role, as moms and pending moms, without working to earn it. There is information -- already here and coming -- about insurance, estate plans, retirement vs. college savings. Especially for those in the Thinking/Trying stages, there is information about what you need to budget for, and how to spend smart, whether for fertility or house or childcare.

If you haven't already heard it, listen to the radio show I posted in July about legal and financial planning. This full 48-minute radio show episode featured conversations at a Choice Mom workshop, inspired by the death of a Choice Mom, that discussed how we take care of our child, legally and financially, as a single person with one paycheck. Experts included estate attorney Micah Salb, Ameriprise-affiliated financial planner Rebecca Hall, and insurance agent Gayle Thompson, who give special insight about what we need in place to protect our child if something happens to us.