submitted by Dr. Aimee Eyvazzadeh

When I tell people that I’m a fertility specialist, I often hear the following, "I don’t know why so many people need IVF. Why don’t they just don’t adopt?" When I hear things like this, I become even more motivated to make sure my patients have support systems in place while riding the rollercoaster of treatment. It is hard for people untouched by fertility challenges to empathize with you - even if they are your close friends and family members. So what do you do? Where do you go for support?

Here are some ways to surround yourself with supportive and positive people:

1. Connect and find support online. There are a number of sites filled with support for you during your treatment. Find a message board that you find easy to use and find people going through the same type of treatment as you, such as:

* DailyStrength.org: an infertility support group that includes over 5,000 members, expert panels, and goal setting groups
* IVF-Infertility.com: connects over 8,000 users around the world with a plethora of resources
* Taking Charge of Your Fertility: user guides, fertility planners, and many discussion groups focused on fertility

You will, of course, find support from the Choice Mom community in the Trying: Fertility experts and comments of this website, the support network blogs, as well as the Choice Moms discussion board.

2. Connect through Facebook. Yes, Facebook has many fertility resources that you may find helpful. There are support groups out there for you depending on your diagnosis. Search "infertility" and check out the groups that sound most appealing to you. Sources like RESOLVE, the national infertility association, Fertile Authority, Conceive Magazine, Creating a Family and Choice Moms are a few resources to check out.

3. Reach out to your fertility doctor’s office. Yes, your doctor’s office is part of your support system. Reach out and ask questions. I’m amazed by questions women post on the fertility message boards that should have been answered before the patients walk out of their doctor’s office. Any good doctor’s office will know psychologists, psychiatrists, acupuncturists, hypnotherapists and massage therapists in your area that work with fertility patients.

4. Call a fertility doctor - regardless of proximity. If you haven’t been going to fertility doctor and feel like you need to see one but are limited by geography don’t worry. A fertility doctor can take care of you remotely. Make a phone consult with a doctor who seems like a good fit for you.

5. Write about your fertility experiences. A blog is a great way to keep an online journal about your journey. You will gain followers who are on the same path to motherhood who can be a source of support. There are a number of websites that will guide you. Blogger is one of the easiest sites -- and it’s free. [Mikki's note: I always welcome women to send me personal stories and insight for this website; I built the website for all of us to use.