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Our gathering of women at the Choice Mom networking event in New York City, held July 2010, featured wisdom and stories from women in all stages of the journey. As a sampler, here are a few tips from the event program.

From Choice Gold sponsor California Cryobank, 866-927-9622
Selecting a sperm donor may feel overwhelming. Message boards are good places to find recommendations. When ready to start your donor selection, it’s helpful to decide which characteristics and traits are important to you. This is very personal and there isn’t a set formula. Make a list of your "must have" traits, such as ethnicity, height, religious background, etc. As you read through profiles you may realize that traits you thought were important may not be as relevant and others become a priority. The input of friends and/or family members can be helpful.

From Choice Silver sponsor East Coast Fertility, 877-838-BABY (2229)
Statistics and general truths aside, every woman is unique. Given just how complicated it is to make a baby in the first place, understanding your own body’s reproductive capability and the changes it might undergo from year to year is an invaluable planning tool. Consider a Fertility Evaluation. Simply put, the screening involves a few simple blood tests and an ultrasound to assess your ovarian function. These tests have been around for years and are tried and true tools in the assessment of fertility. We propose using these tests as a screen to prevent future infertility. We recommend that annual screening begin at 30 years of age or earlier if you have irregular menses, hot flashes, difficulty conceiving after 6 months or a family history of early menopause or infertility. Dr. Michael Zinger, mzinger@eastcoastfertility.com

Choice Silver sponsor Lombardi, Celso, Catinchi and Associates (a Private Wealth Advisory Practice of Ameriprise), Angela Celso-McGurk CFP, (914) 269-6711, angela.m.celso@ampf.com
It is never too early to begin saving for college. With the certainty of increased federal and state income taxes, 529 College Saving Plans are more attractive than ever. Open a 529 plan account for your child as soon as you get his/her social security number and begin a systematic savings plan of something -- anything -- even if is just $50 per month, directly from your bank account.

Choice Bronze sponsor, The Sperm Bank of California, 510-841-1858
If you’re healthy and still ovulate regularly, it may be hard to believe that you could experience road blocks on your path to pregnancy. While most of TSBC’s births are to women who are 35 and older, the hard truth is that conception is more difficult as women age. For this reason, if you are over 35, we highly recommend that you have your fertility evaluated by a reproductive specialist before you start trying to conceive. Assessing your fertility early in the process may increase your chance of success and decrease the time it takes you to conceive.

Single parenting: Keeping communication open and flowing is the best foundation for dealing with parent/child issues as they emerge. This means not judging, not defending, but exploring and encouraging your child to tell you more about what they're feeling, even though at times it may be something hurtful for us to hear. If you find you can't listen in that way, try to get help in being able to do so. It really does make a difference, especially during those stormy teen years. Jane Mattes, mattes@pipeline.com, www.singlemothersbychoice.com

Adoption: from her book Adopting on Your Own: The Complete Guide to Adopting as a Single Parent, Lee Varon, LsVaron@aol.com -- Remember that "Adoption is about finding families for children, not finding children for families."

Personal organizing: Are you trying to get organized but short on space? Think outside of the closet, and get creative. An unused wall can house hanging shelves with decorative baskets, doors are the perfect place for a row of hooks, and the space under furniture can be utilized with rolling plastic bins. Creating ample storage will help to eliminate clutter, maximize space, and streamline your life! Elizabeth Kaplansky, 212.505.8201, www.ParadigmOrganizing.com

Emotional support: The journey to parenthood involves many choices. Educating yourself on what questions to ask can help you successfully navigate the myriad choices, from supports systems to appropriate medical care to knowing what is important when selecting a donor. Your answers are only as good as the questions that you ask. Asking good questions is the key to unlocking the door to becoming a parent. Patricia Mendell, 212-819-1778 or 718-230-9383, www.patriciamendell.com

Health and Wellness Coaching: Are you longing for a healthier you--with more energy? My specialty is in helping people reclaim their health, which leads to aid in conception and lifelong wellness. I am particularly passionate about helping my clients find the emotional reasons for why they eat and giving them tools to tackle their cravings. As a Holistic Health Coach, I address all aspects of the person, and as my clients will tell you, I work on a much deeper level than telling you what you should and shouldn’t eat. My passion is helping people to lead healthier, happier lives and showing them how simple, easy and fun it can be to get there! Wendy Timmons, wtimmons@gmail.com

Learn about 2011 Choice Mom networking events here.
And if you are one of the nearly 500 women who accessed ChoiceMoms.org last month from New York, keep checking the NYC resource guide for ongoing information in your area.