Posted September 23, 2010 at 2:10 PM
filed under: becoming, newborn, stress, tips, waiting
Tips
My favorite connection to see at Choice Mom networking events is when our experienced moms can reassure the pregnant and newborn moms that "everything is going to be all right." I started collecting tips on how to deal with the logistics of newborn days after three women in my local area had babies within a week.
Here is some of the great advice that came from members of our local Choice Mom community.
My big recommendation - get out of the house. Plan to meet at the mall at 7 in the morning and go mallwalking.
Don't worry about cleaning your house. In the big scheme of things, food and clothing comes before cleanliness. If you vacuum, do dishes and clean the bathroom every now and then that is good. Forget about dust, children's toys, scrubbing floors, yard work. Or hire a cleaning lady - we deserve it.
Sometimes it is nice to just have someone over to talk to or to hold the baby while you try to get some things done. Don't be afraid to ask. Or work out deals with the other new moms. Meet at each others houses while one does laundry, or better yet meet at Target.
Don't forget take naps when she does. Most of the things you think you want to do can wait and it is easier to be a good Mom when you are rested. You will need lots of sleep for a while.
I remember being so scared to leave the hospital. I could not believe they were letting me take this baby home. I had no idea what I was doing! My daughter's first bath was comical and I'm lucky I did not break her neck the way it flopped around. But take one day at a time and make very simple meals. Get as much sleep as you can. Even ask someone to come over and watch her so that you can sleep.
When they are tiny babies, you can get bored because they sleep so much. Like someone else suggested, make sure you get out and about. I know the mall near me has an organized Stretch and Stroll event. Perhaps other malls do too.
Grocery delivery comes in very handy, when you need it. In our area we have Coburns Delivers and Lunds and Byerly's delivery (or you can pick up through their drive-through). You can get diapers and everything. It is expensive, but sometimes, especially in the winter, you need it.
Regarding your fears of doing it all alone without family - I am in the very same situation and I know exactly how you feel. As hard as it is, accept whatever help your friends offer. I still struggle with accepting help, but I am always glad when I do. Very early on, when I was ridiculously sleep-deprived, I had a friend come over occasionally for an hour or two so I could sleep. They would watch the baby, or take out the trash for me, or do the dishes. They also brought me food. I had a hard time eating much during my maternity leave, because I only had one hand free most of the time, so I greatly appreciated it whenever someone brought me food.
The other thing I did was hire a post-partum doula who came over 1-2x a week from 10p.m -6 a.m. I still got up to nurse my son, but she would take him in between feedings and I was able to catch up on a little sleep. She also folded my laundry, which was great. It was expensive, but again, a life-saver. Try this website for finding a post-partum doula. They can come at night or during the day for a few hours. I learned a lot from my doula and she helped me through a few of the early "milestones," like giving him his first bath.
What suggestions can you add?
Post a Comment
We ask you enter a valid email to reduce spam. This email will not show. But please remember this is a public page. If you do NOT want your comment to be approved for public viewing, indicate that in the comment and the administrator will be the only one to read it.
NOTE that we just learned of a bug involving yahoo addresses. They are apparently filtered by Google forwarding usually as spam. So if you have a yahoo email and you post a comment for approval, it might take longer for me to discover it for approval. We're working on solving this issue.
Comment Etiquette: Please do not post spam. Please keep the comments on-topic. Please do not post unrelated questions. Anything mean-spirited or off topic will not be approved.
