There is no particular formula about how much it will cost, how long it will take, and what treatment will work to help us conceive. Each one of us has individual circumstances, fertility factors, financial limitations, levels of determination, and ability to deal with the risks, emotions, scheduling and waiting game involved with attempting to conceive.

It can be overwhelming when we start to learn everything we DON'T KNOW about getting pregnant proactively, without a partner to simply have sex with at the right time. For starters, when IS the "right time?"

So here is the step-by-step guide, to make it easier for you to get started.

1) The first step in conceiving a child is to understand your own fertility. We tend to think getting pregnant is easy, especially when we've never TRIED to do it before. And most of us have never before heard of the all-important acronym FSH. Start educating yourself by listening to these easy-to-access interviews:

• Birds and Bees for Grown-Ups (I interview 3 fertility doctors)
• At-home insemination: everything you might want to know but don't know to ask. This interview, with the head of Maia Midwifery, has a tremendous amount of information about conception and insemination in general, whether you are doing it yourself with fresh or frozen sperm, or using a doctor for insemination.

2. Anticipate cost.

3. Find the right doctor for you.

4. Learn how to detect your ovulation.

5. Educate yourself about insemination with a sperm donor: what are your options?

6. Understand the available fertility tests, and what they can tell you.

7. Learn about IUI, IVF, and success rates.

8. Educate yourself about medications and decide whether you need them.

9. Understand how stress, food, health impact your fertility.

10. Build a support network to help you through the process.