I recently attended a talk by money counselor Ruth Hayden, author of "Your Money Life" workbook and many other resources for people who want to understand personal use (misuse?) of money and time. As she pointed out, the two are often linked. Here is some of what I learned.
Posted April 1, 2010 at 9:25 PM
When we do nothing...
Expert Insight
1) We tend to do NOTHING when we don't know what to do, are fearful of the next step, or are afraid we will fail. We stick with the status quo even if we are unhappy. Ruth told the story of a woman who came to her for counseling 10 years ago about her money issues. Ruth had listened to the woman's most pressing money-related concerns and given her insight about how to address them. Yet a decade later, this intelligent, responsible, nice woman had come back to her, having implemented none of the suggestions, and listed the exact same concerns -- according to Ruth's notes -- in the same order. She did not "get" the fact that she had to take real behavioral changes in order to make things happen. She had been stuck for 10 years.
2) Ruth suggested that we tend to spend our money the same way we spend our time. It is often life triggers that make us stop and assess, often at certain age markers. "I thought by this age somehow I would have changed..." or "...this somehow would have happened by now."
Does this sound familiar to you?
I have a lot of great insight from Ruth's talk, which she has given me permission to share. But first I'd like to hear from you. What are you most interested in learning about in regards to managing your life, your money, your time?
Mikki
Reader Comments
Posted April 2, 2010 at 9:19 AM
This is the one area I have been avoiding on this website, as it is the last "hold out" before beginning this journey. Taking into consideration what I've heard people say (that there is always something holding us back), I am pushing forward with plans despite the fact that I have student loans and will be looking for the less expensive child care. I guess my biggest question to myself and others is: How do I do more than just make ends meet? How can I be proactive on such a tight budget? Thanks for all the great information!
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Posted April 21, 2010 at 11:26 AM by H
Money is a major consideration for me as a Thinker. I grew up with a struggling single mother and have only recently started to confront how that experience has shaped my fears about being able to make enough money to support myself consistently much less a child.
Having just read Secrets Of Six-Figure Women (which I highly recommend) I am very curious about the psychological blocks women tend to have around making more money. I have just transitioned from being a starving artist most of my life to finally generating a higher income than I ever imagined for myself and it seems to have had a lot to do with working through my own subconscious fears about money, wealth, asking clients for higher fees, and believing I cold generate more income and was worthy of it.
Money is so fraught for most of us, we don't even realize how deeply ingrained our prejudices and limiting beliefs around money are until we actively confront them.