submitted by Lori
Will you ever have to prove your donor child doesn’t have a father? When I gave birth to my daughter via anonymous donor IUI in 1999, I hoped that the information regarding her father would be left blank on her birth certificate.

The relationship between a single woman and her adoption attorney is vital. This person can and should be your strongest ally for finding the placement that works -- and making sure the adoption is finalized in a timely way. This advice was posted to the Choice Mom discussion board by Holly, a wonderful resource for Choice Moms who use the foster care adoption route in particular.

This is a continuation of Lori's story, who realized that someday her donor-conceived child might need to qualify for federal student loans. Since the paperwork requires income records for both parents, and since there are plenty of other occasions in her state of Alabama where having a blank or "none" on the birth certificate might not work with government employees, she wanted to be proactive. She was surprised to learn recently what she really needed it for.

A woman on the Alternatives to Marriage Project Facebook page wrote that she was denied coverage for fertility treatments because she isn't married. She's on the Choice Mom path. Let's weigh in on which insurance companies do a better job of coverage.

I have managed to go 11 years without holding a full-time job. I am Choice Mom of two kids, own a large home, and am self-employed with ChoiceMoms.org now as my primary source of income. So...how have I managed to do that?

We usually include an estate planner at Choice Mom networking events, to make sure women understand everything they need to about protecting their child both BEFORE and after motherhood. Here's a tip that Julie, 28 weeks pregnant, learned from attorney Chuck Roulet at the Minneapolis event.

After a Choice Mom died in her third trimester, leaving a son born posthumously, we became more aware of the importance of having an estate plan in place -- as this Choice Mom had done -- even BEFORE we conceive or adopt.

Choice Mom adviser Ami Jaeger (Santa Fe) generously offers this advice and more, as available in the Choice Mom Guide to Fertility:

If you decide to conceive with the assistance of a known donor, there are several critical legal steps that you should complete with him to clarify your expectations and intentions. It is important to take these steps to protect your legal relationship with the child.

Three important documents have been supplied by Choice Moms.
1. Jessica created a list of comprehensive questions to discuss with her known donor candidates to help put expectations into contract form.
2. Fiona is a Canadian family attorney, who offered a sample agreement to use as a template for a known donor contract.
3. A co-parenting agreement has also been offered as a sample.

There are many things to talk about with a known donor candidate. This Choice Chat podcast covers many of the issues with two unique experts.