submitted by Lori
Will you ever have to prove your donor child doesn’t have a father? When I gave birth to my daughter via anonymous donor IUI in 1999, I hoped that the information regarding her father would be left blank on her birth certificate.

This is a continuation of Lori's story, who realized that someday her donor-conceived child might need to qualify for federal student loans. Since the paperwork requires income records for both parents, and since there are plenty of other occasions in her state of Alabama where having a blank or "none" on the birth certificate might not work with government employees, she wanted to be proactive. She was surprised to learn recently what she really needed it for.

Thanks to the generosity of Choice Mom Emily, I've been able to spend a wonderful 10-day holiday in London with my kids and parents. While here I met in Coram's Field with 14 women, including Moms, Thinkers and Tryers from Belfast, Dublin, Belgium and many others in the United Kingdom. I also met with a large group of Ph.D. students in Cambridge, who were interested in the Choice Mom story.

We all know it's not healthy to be in debt. But when you've got fertility or adoption costs, a home to set up, a safe car to invest in, loans to pay off, and childcare to save or pay for, raising a child on one paycheck can be incredibly daunting. One friend of Choice Moms at numerous workshops has been Ameriprise, which offers this advice on debt.

That's how much it reportedly costs to raise a child these days. That is, if you are part of a married couple with middle class income. The report indicated that the amount you spend on a child depends on what you earn. But here's what the average costs tend to be.

If you need to get creative about finding ways to pay for fertility treatments, here are a few tips from Choice Mom-friendly Laurel Fertility Care (San Fran):

Some Choice Moms embark on this journey because they have high-powered, high-income jobs and can afford to build a family on their own. Others don't earn that much. For those who are trying to pay off debt and keep on top of bills in order to balance single motherhood, here are more tips from author Kara Stefan, author of "Head of Household: Money Management for Single Parents."

Laurel Fertility Center of the San Francisco area became a Choice Mom sponsor in May 2010, which means they will regularly be featured on this website for tips related to fertility treatment. Here are tips from the clinic's Dr. Aimee Eyvazzadeh about how to get the most for your fertility dollar.

At the San Francisco event, organizational specialist Kim Guay of A Clear Vision Organizing offered these tips for getting ready for parenthood.

I recently discovered a great book by Kara Stefan titled "Head of Household: Money Management for Single Parents." It covers budgeting, childcare, credit, healthcare, housing, insurance and more.

May is "Money Matters" month on the website. This month we'll take a look at what we're learning and sharing, from each other and from experts, about financial matters. Starting with this week's Choice Mom query: As parents who might expect more help from our kids, but with one paycheck, how do we handle allowances?

I have managed to go 11 years without holding a full-time job. I am Choice Mom of two kids, own a large home, and am self-employed with ChoiceMoms.org now as my primary source of income. So...how have I managed to do that?

We usually include an estate planner at Choice Mom networking events, to make sure women understand everything they need to about protecting their child both BEFORE and after motherhood. Here's a tip that Julie, 28 weeks pregnant, learned from attorney Chuck Roulet at the Minneapolis event.

Uber organized Jessica, a Choice Mom in every way, will deliver her first child in a few months. While she was in the Thinking process -- preceding a long Trying phase -- she developed a worksheet that calculated how much she would need to spend trying to conceive, for prenatal care, for newborn items, and for post-delivery childcare expenses for a year. Here are the numbers she came up with.

Choice Moms Expo sponsor Joan Gilles, of Ameriprise Financial Planning, offered this important tip about disability insurance. Admittedly, this is a form of insurance I hadn't given much thought to. But as single parents, there are a LOT of ways we need to be smart about protecting our assets, and this is one we need to understand.

I recently attended a talk by money counselor Ruth Hayden, author of "Your Money Life" workbook and many other resources for people who want to understand personal use (misuse?) of money and time. As she pointed out, the two are often linked. Here is some of what I learned.

After a Choice Mom died in her third trimester, leaving a son born posthumously, we became more aware of the importance of having an estate plan in place -- as this Choice Mom had done -- even BEFORE we conceive or adopt.

Dawn Davenport at Creating a Family is the source I trust for up-to-date adoption information. Here is some of what she's compiled about the various costs of adoption.

Don't miss the special section about the costs associated with fertility treatment.
In addition, Choice Mom Marinela did a comparison of fertility drug costs by calling various pharmacies. Here's what she found:

The expense of fertility drugs is depressing, even for couples with two paychecks, or for people who are fortunate to have good insurance coverage for fertility treatment. Here are some options for learning more about absorbing the cost and finding good prices.